A weekend of changed plans and cancellations

Nothing went as planned this weekend, at all.  Certainly, that's nothing unusual for me, especially when my friends mingle into the picture. 
As most people know, this weekend was the first day of spring (basically), so I had two to three Pagan events to hit this weekend, that I was actually excited about.  Saturday night I was originally supposed to meet with the Pagan group I met with - their reception after ceremony actually.  I was really interested in meeting them in their element, but this all got canceled due to time constraints. I find this confusing; I know people are generally way too busy for their own good, but how does one cancel a holiday? This left me open to attend the other Pagan group's spring ritual on Saturday night.   Naturally, this didn't happen either.

It appears that every Pagan holiday, someone from Illinois decides to visit.  I love visits, but I'm not open about my odd spiritual life to everyone.  Very few people actually.  I spent all week thinking of a reasonable excuse to leave my friends at 9 at night.  What kind of meeting does one have at 9 at night that they have to attend alone?  I never really came up with a good answer, turns out I didn't have to due to cancellations. So, over dinner Mike blurts out "Oh! tell them about your religious tour!" I think he does these things to me on purpose.  Here's the laydown of friends at the table:

K: self proclaimed non-church going Catholic, but a bit aware of my odd take on things and fine with it
C: self proclaimed not really practicing anything person - but as a youngster went to Baptist church...someone I'd be okay with saying a couple things about my ideas with
P: practicing Catholic. Gave up three or four things for Lent.....NOT comfortable running my mouth. Although he's a good guy...not comfortable.

Thankfully at this point in my tour, I've mostly visited Christian folk.....I just omitted my stints in Paganism.  Although I realize that all of them are aware of where I stand.  C & P went to high school with me.... and oh man was that a hoopla. There was a group of girls who exclaimed to be Christian and you can insert this phrase from them "A WITCH!" Needless to say, they are probably aware....but I haven't personally acknowledged any things ever said about me on this topic, so I just go with that.  If you want to know I've never referred to myself as a witch. Also, Mike has a habit of telling people about me and not telling me what other people know about me.  He told his brother to not get trashed around me because of things I've been through.  Although that's nice of both of them....someone should have let me know. So, most likely, everyone is well aware of my not really witchery.


I just said where I've been too, no details.  But they were all curious and P actually offered to answer any questions I have about Catholicism.  Unfortunately, I don't have any because I'm really just looking for a place the speaks to me, the details I'll get in step two. I know there's some sort of influence on me, I can feel it....the problem is I don't know how to actually hear/feel that influence clearly.  The only times I get close is probably after some alone yoga...and all the influence is pointing in one direction, and it's not Christianity.

Drained by the anger and grief
Fazed by the envy and greed
The secret cries for a release
The lucidity hidden deep in sweet pandemonium

The truth that could set souls free
Is buried within sweet pandemonium
Concealed by disbelief
The riddle stays veiled in sweet pandemonium